So I was on Twitter when someone posted up this certain text from Tumblr. I, as a hardcore fangirl, relates to this so much. I have to say, I am deeply embarrassed but yeah I do daydream about this kind of stuff really. It just comes with the package of being a fan I guess?
For me, I would create certain characteristics of my favourite bias. How he is in real life, like from my point of view. Basically what I WANT him to be. For example, Hanbin from iKon. His characterics would be shy, new to love, hardworking, always trying to satisfy other people. Especially me his "girlfriend" HAHAHAHA
I would imagine our first meeting, how our eyes met, how we talked, how we became close, how our love sparked, the struggle to meet him in public, how he took care of me when I was sick or harrased by his fans for being his "lover" LOL
All of this sounds absolutely absurd but in a way, it makes me happy. I'll find myself excitedly waiting to when I get the chance to shove my earphones in my ears and close my eyes, for the rain to come so I could take a nap, and for bedtime because the golden time for my daydreaming is when I close my eyes waiting for sleep to come. I sound very sad, sigh.
Its weird but its the only thing that keeps me going. Its like I have another life waiting for me before I sleep. The life the way I want it to be. Maybe its because I'm lonely and have no one to talk to so I create this illusion in my head to keep me company. Hahahaha, I guess thats kinda true.
The downfall, the downside, the saddest thing is that the person I'm dreaming of doesn't even know I exist. To him I'm just another fangirl who screams and squeals everytime he does something adorable or sexy.
To him I'm just a fangirl, but to me he's everything.
DANG, I SOUND LIKE A WEIRD ASS GIRL, SORRY...
